I am sorry we need to end this session...

Wow- that has never happened- we had counseling yesterday and Mr George asked how things were going to Marcus- well he turned around and would not listen or talk to him- so Mr George said mom how is it going- I said about the same - nothing volatile at home ( he did lose his childcare this week because of issues) However, Mr George he does not do what he needs to do when he becomes angry with the word Blue- he says I do not want to- I do not have to - I hate you- I do not care-. Meanwhile Marcus is grunting and into things he should not be into- Mr George was ignoring the behaviors until Marcus threw something and said you need to stop messing with my stuff Marcus yelled no and then Mr George said we need to end the session- or Marcus you can come in here and we can talk it out and see what is going on that you are not doing what you need to do- well he went on with talking to me for a few minutes etc and Marcus was just not be respectful of Mr George and all and so he ended the session- we did not get anywhere- well yes yes we did George saw Marcus in the light that I see him everyday-

Everyday- so Mr George asked me to bring someone with me next time so that person can sit with Marcus while I talk to George and then Marcus can go in and talk with him.

It appears the next level is coming-

I know many have good intentions of helping us and appreciate it so much- I need a break- I do

this week I handled things quite well with what has happened. Please understand this type of behavior of outbursts is daily- maybe small- maybe big but for sure it is daily- and it takes a toll on you- me I should say-

I was actually talking with a friend last night saying these are the days where I wish I had a husband to take up some of the behavior issues - I ask myself at times what was I thinking of being a single parent- parenting is not for sissies and single parenting is definately not for the weak. Although at time you feel like you can not handle it anymore and God's gracious hand give you the strength you need

Not sure where this is going- just thoughts I have had lately

So if you are a parent - hang in there - you are not alone in this - someone else has been through what you are going through- If you are a single parent- You are still not alone- there are friends and family to help you- let down your pride and ask- you are not weak when you ask. You are being strengthened.

Back to Marcus and where we are at- well I will be seeking out a referral to rule out or rule in any neurological issues with an MRI. we will see counseling again next week and see what happens the next step is counseling weekly at home and school.

I ask myself continuously what am I doing wrong- I follow what the professionals say to do- I try all the tactics -yet I can not get anywhere- yet at school it appears he does well- minus a few referrals a month. Although at school he does have a teacher - a teacher aide- 2 behavioral specialist - guidance counselor all working with him- Hmm maybe if I had that many at the house all the time it would be different-

I know I have come a long way in dealing with him - however as said before the daily outbursts do take a toll on you- and the fact you could look at him cross eyed or tell him no about something or not right now for something - and if does not like it he goes off- its not fun and I do not recommend it - :)
We shall see what the week holds- this morning I was already told I don't want to in regards to Blue