Thursday, March 27, 2014

Bullying- I dont like it

ok- so we have been off the grid for a bit-that I apologize but we have been working through something's

Bullying-
  • An Imbalance of Power: Kids who bully use their power—such as physical strength, access to embarrassing information, or popularity—to control or harm others. Power imbalances can change over time and in different situations, even if they involve the same people.
  • Repetition: Bullying behaviors happen more than once or have the potential to happen more than once.
Bullying includes actions such as making threats, spreading rumors, attacking someone physically or verbally, and excluding someone from a group on purpose.

We have been dealing with this at Marcus' school- not too sure if I am happy how it was handled when initially informed- however I do like his teachers

You see Marcus has been bullied since October- who knew- I did not until the end of February when it all came to a head- it has begun with name calling and teasing about his glasses - then it was moved to being asked to copy homework and M said no and was called a  F... A... in which horrified me- he was also called the N word and everything hit the fan when I went to drop him off at school for an event and he did not want to be seen with me- why his answer I am white he is black and they will ask why- and I will have to explain- (meanwhile half his school is this way).

Well it was more to that - they know he is adopted he has shared his story with some- and with that the punk kids said his "real' mom did not want him - which tore him up inside - Once this all happened and I was able to discuss with him- I said honey - I am your real mom and your birth mom was not a matter of not wanting you it was a matter of she was unable to care for you.

You see adoption in our house is a positive word- we are open and honest when he comes to ask questions about his birth family.  so listen here don't mess with my son and don't knock him about being adopted- we have been through it all and back- and these punk kids are NOT going to bring him backwards-

Because it has affected him in a negative way- at home he was beginning to be disrespectful in an ugly way. I had no idea cause he kept in in so long - he said he thought it would go away- well its going to go away because this momma will not tolerate bullying-. this mom will make sure her son's well being is looked after-

I can see why so many kids are affected by bullying- and how things can happen.
Be involved in your kids lives- be their advocate- make sure you stay on top of the school- Take a Stand for your KIDS!

No one should be bullied.

Sunday, January 19, 2014

changes

sometimes in life you need to change how you done things - to better yourself
trying not to be concerned what others think-making sure you line up with what God has for you-
some may not understand and its ok- some may tease, some may encourage you - some will just join you for the ride and encourage you as you go.

praying for amazing changes to come in my life- growing in all God has for me this year!

Thursday, January 16, 2014

what has been going on

well as the previous post states my word this year is ME- a focus on me - so I have been riding my bike atleast 3 times a week 2 miles for now- eating better- pretty much stopped drinking pop- looking at more what I enjoy and taking the time to do it- right now we are still working on getting the house back to normal - back in July we had a flood- kitchen is still not done but we are closer then ever-
finding out that this whole flood thing has taken a toll on me- its stressful when your house is turned upside down especially when it is the entire downstairs-

I often say I can not cook or such- its not I cant I don't like too- and with my kitchen being a disaster area for so long I have come to a better appreciation for it and want to learn more about cooking- I know for some of you get off the floor-

I want to have people over ( my house is small but ...) and cook for them or just chill out- I am someone who does not do that at all- but its time- baby steps- nothing major

so here are some pictures of what its been like (this is when it happened) and some after pictures as well - not totally done








Among all the chaos in the house Marcus still remains on the honor roll- and has been hanging with a friend who lives around the corner- plus doing the normal middle school junk

Thursday, January 2, 2014

ME

I know what a title- but its my word for the year 2014- is that selfish nope its not- cause I tend to not take care of me but everything and everyone else and put me last- so this year- more time for me- to read- to dive into a study of the word- to take more baths ( i know more info then needed)- time for adult time adult conversation- time to go workout - i mean it all is perspective and too many years i have focused on meeting others needs and not mine own- the word no may come out of my mouth more often if it does not meet my needs or my familiy's needs. time for me- that does not mean I will neglect things just rearrange things- so my word is ME

Monday, November 18, 2013

where has the time gone

today my life was forever changed 8 years ago- I had no idea what was to come in the next 6 years- for this was the day I became Marcus' mom- yes I adopted him through the foster care system and my life was forever changed and hopefully his too.
I have learned a lot over the last several years.
What are they you ask- here is a list
1. Unconditional Love is so powerful
2. that Nothing is Impossible for God to those who Believe
3. the power of prayer is so amazing
4. Trusting God with what He has entrusted you with
5. Hope is the promise of tomorrow
6. Never Giving Up - fight hard
7. that God can change things in an instant
8. Forgiveness is a powerful tool
9. Honesty is crucial and Consistency is essential
10. Laughter is needed

I encourage those of you looking to adopt - adopt those kids in foster care that need the loving homes that you have. These kids are amazing, I know this quite well. You can make a difference.




Saturday, October 26, 2013

the last weekend in october

I often think back during this last weekend of October- why? for several years in a row we spent this weekend in the crisis unit- and this time of year would always be the spiraling out of control time. you won't understand even if you were walking beside me or been through something similar-because it was my living turmoil- oh Michele you are just exaggerating. you may think but for me nope not really. I think back to realize how far we have come. I think back of the screaming ( him yelling I hate you), the bruises (he gave me), the restraint techniques I had to learn, the many times I sweated as I held on for dear life to the incredible hulk child, the times things were thrown across the room (wooden stools he threw), the times he spent in the TO room at school banging to get out, the times he would punch the windows in the car, the times he would take off running and not stop, the times where he would run out of the house and begin to torment the dog with the doorbell or punch the car. There were many of nights where I would just say what am I to do. not many know but I was scared to be at home with him often staying with friends. October was the trigger month for reasons I do not know - something in his past its called PTSD and it happens in kids.
I often look back to say thank you God for your love and your healing power- this is our 3rd year of no major outbreaks no crisis centers, no yelling, no bruises, no not being scared to stay at home.

instead, we laugh, we goof off, we act all crazy together. we talk, we learn, we grow together.
I learned a lot from marcus- I learned not to give up not to let go- to keep pressing on when there seemed no hope. that every person deserves a chance- oh it cost me a lot during those times, my emotional state, my physical state were all drained. but I am thankful for healing for wholeness and for redemption. I learned from marcus forgiveness is such a powerful weapon against those who have hurt us- he took a stand for himself and overcame so much. so very proud of him.
so I look back on this weekend so I can look forward to so many more exciting events to come.

we went from
 to this

Friday, October 25, 2013

middle school soccer tryouts

well Marcus tried out for his first school team- he made the first cut but unfortunately he did not make the second cut- most who made it were 8th graders.
we got home and he was filling his water bottle, he turned around, his eyes welled up and he bursted in to tears- mom I wanted to make the team- I said I know- I know - gave him a hug- and said now we know how it is - so next year we are prepared- I know he said but I still wanted to make the team

your heart breaks for you children when they hurt or are disappointed- you want to fix it but know you cant-

he still is disappointed but he is with his Coach Gig tonight so that should help mend the hurt a little bit.

He is still a winner in my book

So he did not make the soccer team yet his first 9 weeks grades were excellent 1 B the rest As - so proud of him- so very proud- he is in all advanced classes. I am so so proud- he is awesome