single parenting

i know i am not the only single parent out there- and i know i only have one child- so my life is not as difficult as others who have multiple children and are single parents-
i get that -
for me - right now parenting marcus is not that hard just normal kid/tween stuff which i am truly grateful- for me right now its the everyday tasks that seem daunting-
work- help M with homework get meals together- and make dinner- track practice 3 times a week- church and responsibilities there- plus appointments for him and me-

sometimes you just wish you had someone to do the running around for you- its tiring- if you need to go to the school for some reason its you not anyone else- its you who gets the call if he is sick its you who has to run him to the orthodontist on one side of town and then run to his drs appt on the other side. its you who has to run to the store to pick up things for a project or to talk things over about different areas. its you you you oh i know this is a choice i made - i made the choice to become a single mom- it is just tiring at times-

i love being a mom don't get me wrong - he is a joy and a delight and so glad i did not give up on him- he is a lot of fun- so smart - such a servant- and he wants to spend so much time with me- i am glad of that but sometimes i just need space and adult time- anyone get it?

single parenting is not for the faint at heart and it takes so much strength to be one- so proud of all of you who are single parents- keep going you can do it

A gift to me...

This is one of my favorite gifts I got yesterday!
Dear mommy,
I want to wish you a happy 42nd birthday. I love you will all my heart more then the sun and the stars in the sky. You love and care for me all the time and I just want to thank you for everything you have done to change my life. You encourage me in soccer and track and you will be the loudest cheering me on the sideline.You never quit ...at all and you stayed with me through all the struggles I've had. You still loved me no matter what I did. I love you mommy
Sincerely,
Marcus John Danielson

just a reference to the I love you more then the stars... I would sing that and write that to him when he was in the crisis units or when he was in the residential facilities- how precious this letter is to me

 

I look back and think to myself how precious life is and how truly blessed I am to have Marcus as my son

 

I have learned so much and he has taught me so much. From how truly it is to love unconditionally no matter what to the fact there are people out there that need love and consistency and they will go far.

 

Marcus is on the honor roll, no behavior issues, is taking a student leadership role in youth at church,

He wants others to know that with love, grace and hope your life can be changed- not just the love of a mother but also the love of God- I know our God is Big seen it for my own eyes-

 

Love that boy and blessed beyond all measure to be his mom

things i have been thinking of..

ok- so your life changes a bunch when you lose someone close- i have learned that over the last year and half.

family is so important to me and trusting God with all things has been a matter of priority-

hold those you love close to you- make sure you tell those you love in fact you do love them-

don't sweat the small stuff- still learning this-

read your Bible daily and look to God for the answers-

we are not promised tomorrow- so what are you doing today to make a difference- I try and think of that daily- sometimes I don't think I make a difference for that day and probably do not. working on that

saturday i had the opportunity to walk through a park in downtown tampa- looking around i thought who are touching these lives that are here- there were many homeless in the park- why can we no make a difference in their lives-

reach out to those who may not know what God is all about- pour love into their lives - if you can meet their need meet it- your life will be changed by touching their life

i have been off a lot lately- i love my job- i love reaching into kids lives - i love our lifegroups-
there is just something not quite right though- still trying to figure it all out - and will i am sure- normally do

so get out there make a difference- what do you have to lose. remember make sure you tell those you care about that you care about them-

5 guests today and...

well we had 5 guests today in Kidzone- they were awesome kids and i hope we see them back- which means we would have had to overflow into the hallway if everyone was there today- that is a good problem-
We talked about things we deal with and what the Bible says about it-

Something the kids are loving is Quizarama- we have some smart kids in which they know their Bible- some of the younger ones just buzz in to buzz in and at times know the answer- its awesome to see them retain what they learn.

now the and..

busy months ahead but it will be good- track starts soon and we will be going on vacation and then Marcus will have camps-

then football will start- yes you read it he wants to play football which is fine- i will love watching him play-  will keep you posted

we get through...

God is so funny- not hahaha- but sometimes the word he brings through church is so timely. I will be honest with you and sometimes I feel a lone ( i know I am not) but we talked about what to do when you know someone who needs comfort - the do and not do list.
I think my biggest pet peeve and it was brought up was do not tell the person you know what they are going through- you may have been through similar things but you do not know what they feel or what is going on inside- just be there to listen to them - maybe even be quiet - cry with them - drink coffee with them.

we lost mom in august of 2011 but some days it feels like yesterday- oh we get through but have not gotten over it- Marcus questions at times and honestly i do too- sometimes things are done or said to set off the emotions again--lately been thinking there is a hole in my heart that is not closed-

comfort words that do not help- she is in a better place - well... maybe she is not sick anymore but she is not here so i would disagree with you there- i know i can not change the fact she is gone- I get that- that does make up for the void though-


so we do get through- most days we get through well-  .....we never get over it though

We held on to hope

Well almost a year ago we found out my aunt had breast cancer ( this was just 6 months after my mom passed away)- its been a tough long hall over the last year or so with all that was going on for my uncle and aunt- but ...
We serve a great big God and yesterday I received some awesome news- my aunt is in remission and I am so thrilled for them and their family-

Now as my uncle would say let the partying begin!
We love you Aunt Cheryl- You are a survivor!

How could I doubt

 that was then- wow how could I doubt and question raising this little guy

 into this young man- I am so blessed. I shake my head often to think where we have come from- in fact tonight Marcus and I were just talking about the day our lives changed forever - the day I had to call Coach Gig and then the sheriff's department- Marcus holds no bitterness and he says he knows that everyone was just trying to help him.

Our conversations are so open and so awesome- he asks such pertinent things to life-

How was I the fortunate one to be his mom- God allowed me to go through what we did so we can see where we are going- Marcus and I talk a lot and now I smile so much more - I love being his mom, he is a treasure. His teachers say that he is a pleasure to teach, so consciousness, so caring, and considerate of others. I did something right :) Time and commitment - lots of energy

Wednesday night when the missionaries were there- Marcus leaned over to me and said I will be doing that someday- I want to teach children all over the world about Jesus and what He has done for me- Wow wow wow- Marcus gets it -I love that