Just to share

Here is Clarence cleaning Isaac's face

Yes yes yes

Well today I was able to go to work- because of my sister again she saved the day.

She would not say she saved the day- its just what we do for one another-
Anyway - why the yes yes yes- because I have an appointment with the therapist for Marcus on Thursday night and she does weekends or Saturdays so this is good- the problem is she does not take his insurance so this is going to be mighty expensive - not sure how it will happen but God will provide- this is a much needed step in our family- I am relieved to start it- honestly I do not care how much it costs (okay I do but) cause if it is going to help Marcus and myself and those around us then great-

Anyway Thursdays appointment is for me and to give her all the details of what I know so she can figure out the best plan for him- her specialities are- single parenting (check), adoption (check), ADHD (check), PTSD (check), anxiety (check) and a few others - wow I am truly excited.

Still have not heard in regards to busing information - I had to change childcare -do not get me started- so we had to change bus information and childcare and I am hoping it will be soon so again I do not miss work- oh my son is important and I will do whatever but not being at work does not help pay the bills

1st day of 2nd grade

Well today started off a little rocky but not too bad- he was a little nervous about new kids- I said you are in the same class- same teacher same students ( he did have 1 new child) so when we got there and saw this he was good to go

I dropped him off- ran some papers to his Dr and then went to church for a bit a folded newsletters- then went to lunch with Pastor Larry and Deanna, Pastor T and Cathy- it was nice- a very calm day very nice day for me.

Then went and picked him up he earned 9/10 points today so that was good-

These are the best!! (Mrs Berns on left and Mrs Crossley his teacher on the right)
So tomorrow we are off - schools are closed- I am off work because of it-rrrrr- I know safety of the family first.

Black Sharpie, Green Couch and Marcus

This combination is bad news-

Marcus went to bed tucked him in- worked on my previous blog - came downstairs to get some carrots and chill when I came to put my stuff down what do I see.

Sharpie pen writing on my couch-with a picture- UGH

"I love you mommy you are so nice" was written on my couch- I thought oh no I am not going to be nice now boy- you wrote with permanent marker on my couch- UGH

As I am steaming - I scrubbed most of it off with the fabric cleaner for the couch and then proceeded to call Adam and Lori they laughed- I was not laughing not at all

Adam said at least it was something nice - I said he could have asked for a piece of paper-

I checked on him and gave him a kiss-sleeping so sound and sweet looking

Smile- FAITH

1. Believing when you do not see it
2. Walking in Faith is obeying when you do not understand it
3. Walking in Faith is giving when you do not have it
4. Walking in Faith-persisting when you do not feel like it.
5. Walking in Faith is thanking before you receive it
6. Walking in Faith is trusting -if you do not get it

For me 4 and 6 stand out the greatest in my mind right now and let me expand on it (these were points from Pastor Larry today)

So - Walking in Faith persisting when you do not feel like it- that is me- this past week- Wednesday Night I did not want to be there- Saturday I did not want to go to life coaching- today I did not want to teach Sunday School-all of these things I love to do and you know what even though I did not want to do these things or feel like it- I was uplifted by each of these meetings-not everyone knows exactly what I am going through and that is okay-
Walking in Faith and trusting- Pastor Larry spoke from Hebrews 11:39-40
---All these were approved through their faith, but they did not receive what was promised, since God had provided something better for us, so that they would be made perfect without us
You know you could get discouraged where it says they did not receive what was promised- because I think that is where I have been lately discuraged by what God has promised but I need to trust God even more because of the later portion of the scriputre verse He is providing something better. Better then he promised wow! How amazing is that for God to do that for me?
I need to keep my eyes on Jesus and not the situations at hand- oh I know that is so easier then done-
I truly do not understand all that is going on right now and why but I need to continue to walk in Faith and to continue to serve God with everything I have.

This is what happened today -Marcus and I went for lunch " back to school " lunch I have done it every year since having him-
I was not sure of what I was getting myself into because he started with an attitude when we were in the car.
So we went to Sonny's and he was the best he has been in a long while
The family sitting next to us asked if he was always liked that and I was like no - this is a good moment-She was like he is so well behaved- he was really - manners and everything- we talked about how he was feeling about school and if anything was making him nervous- he said he just wanted the kids to be nice to him- I said well you use your words and show them and they will begin to do the same- I told him Iknow he can do it.
So anyway- after we were done the husband and wife talked with Marcus and the husband was a sheriff and said you were so well behaved and gave him $1.oo he said you continue making good choices and you are a good boy-
okay okay- out of the blue these people say this to us after the week we have had - I do not think so - it was a God thing
Honestly I was thinking if they only really knew- but for me it was a glimmer- of yes it is possible-

This evening or should I say today has been a good day- I smiled today- Marcus and I got his stuff for school ready- then layed on the couch and watched the olympics- I answered 50 million questions about the sports we were watching-but it was a good day-

Deep Breaths

I have been doing that today- today was a pretty decent day- not great but better- had 1 minor- major meltdown- but he got his act together fairly quickly-
I think the biggest thing that bothers me is the words- words hurt so much- and I can not control what comes out of his mouth.
I am tired- I went to pick him up after life coaching and fell asleep at Adam and Brenda's for a bit.
Life Coaching was good- honestly I was pretty quiet - usually I am more engaged in the conversation but not today- that is okay-
I am going to make it through- Keep praying - I sure do appreciate it

Not sure what I am feeling- today- just - calm- not peaceful but calm- my thoughts are not racing- today is a better day. tomorrow I anticipate will be a better day

Good morning

It is Saturday-
I was able to go to the store last night- Adam came and watched him (he was sleeping) it was nice to go and be able to walk through the aisles without worries of outbursts because I told him no or something he did not want to hear.
So this morning - I am working on tidying up the house-I have life coaching today-
The dryer went out last night so I am hanging clothes everywhere- but it is fine-
Working on dancing in the rain (or the deluge I should say)-
Marcus is still in his bed- I was up at 630 so I got somethings accomplished so far-step by step
moment by moment
All quiet for the moment listening to my praise and worship songs as I clean my bathroom (what fun :) )